MultiCare Health System

How to Help Our Loved Ones

There are many ways to help our loved ones through this difficult process. Here are some basic and very valuable guidelines:

  • Be gentle.
  • Be patient.
  • Be willing to listen.
  • Acknowledge and allow their feelings and give them permission to express their feelings in many ways.
  • Include them in discussions and decisions.
  • Try not to take their impatience and anger personally.
  • Help them develop a good support network.
  • Allow them as much control over the situation as possible.
  • Allow and encourage them to do as much as they can for themselves, regardless of how slow, painful or difficult it may seem.
  • Don’t underestimate their symptoms, pains and fears. They are real to them.
  • Learn what you can about the disability/ disease so you will understand and can review information with your loved one.
  • Allow them to talk about the situation; don’t use generalities such as, “Everything will be ok.”
  • Give them some space…physical and emotional.
  • Avoid nurturing false hopes or unrealistic goals.